Becoming A Lesser Man

“Successful weight loss takes programming, not willpower”

Phil McGraw


This Is About Dieting… Sorry

Don’t worry I’m not gonna get to squishy in this post, I just thought it was worth sharing a bit. So towards the end of last year I had some really strange things go on with me physically (you can read about it here) which resulted in me needing an MRI and here is the meat of the matter.

I am not going to disclose what I weighed (or currently weigh), maybe some day I can admit it freely. When I went for the MRI I got weighed before the scan and was told quite bluntly “If you weighed 1/2 a stone more then we couldn’t allow you on the machine”. This hit me like a tonne of bricks and I realised that I had to finally do something about my weight.

If you’ve read anything on this site before then you know that I suffer with severe depression and acute anxiety. One of the ways I have “coped” with this is having an attitude towards food that was basically “eat what you like, you’ve got bigger problems to worry about”. Basically I was comfort eating and giving myself an excuse to continue doing so, no matter how bad it got.

So now I have decided to do something about it and so far I have had some great results. Please understand I am not trying to show off in any way and I’m not claiming to “have the answer”, people’s relationships with food is complicated and different things will work for different people. All I am saying is that the events surrounding that scan is what finally gave me the kick in the arse that I needed to do something about it at last.

Christmas quickly followed the scan so trying to lose weight around this time was going to ultimately be futile so once again I gave myself an excuse but I stand by my decision. So when the new year started I really tried to make a difference.

I am not going to bore you with all the details and cut to the chase. As of time of writing I have lost just over 3 stone and quite frankly I’m really proud of myself. In the last decade of suffering with Depression and Anxiety I haven’t done much that I am “proud” of so this was one of the first times I was really happy with myself.

This was a rare feeling for me and I had to semi-apologise to people when I basically said to them:

“I’ve lost over three stone and while it doesn’t affect you at all I want to tell people because it’s the first time I’ve been proud of myself in 10 years”

Maybe I don’t need to apologise but I still did with every person I told. I’m sure that’s something to do with my depression but I still think it’s a big step to finally say “I did something good”.

I’ll probably intermittently keep you a little updated on this and maybe I’ll finally be able to admit what I weighed and what I currently weighed but currently I am to ashamed to do so. I’ve probably kept this post quite short because as I type it I find myself a bit shaky and uncomfortable and I hope you understand. Maybe I’ll do a post that goes a bit more in depth at a later date.

Thanks for reading this one guys and I’ll see you next time. Until then, take care of yourselves. Peace.

LeighPouse


Bonus Video

I am now going to watch this to calm down and cheer up 😛 .

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