“Writing quotes is therapy for my damaged brain.”
One Day, I’ll Be Able To Stop Writing About Therapy
So I sit here again, waiting for my last therapy appointment that’s in a few days.
I’m gonna be pretty vague in this post so I apologise for that. I was hoping to able to talk about my therapy and what it has been about bur I’m not quite ready. What I will say is that this time around we’ve focused on my PTSD and that my next appointment is for “relapse prevention”.
Unfortunately the NHS is unable to give people the amount of sessions they might need but instead gives you a set block of appointments. I understand why this system is in place but it is inherently flawed. Every therapist, psychologist and doctor I’ve ever talked to about this all agree. They simply cannot supply the amount of help that people need.
The Mental Health Services are being strangled at the moment and sadly that doesn’t seem to be ending any time soon.
The big problem with the block of appointments system is that if you aren’t “cured” by the end of your run then you are basically on your own. This is something I’ve had to deal with before. Once you’re done with your block of appointments you can re-refer yourself immediately, which sounds great. What isn’t great though is the 6-8 months waiting list you then find yourself at the back of.
Again, I just want to reiterate that I don’t blame the NHS or the Mental Health Services. They are fantastic things full of fantastic people that want to help others and we should forever be thankful for them existing.
So from next week I’ll be back at the end of that queue, waiting for another shot to reclaim my sanity.
I’m really scared of what is going to happen going forward if this “relapse prevention” doesn’t work. I’ve got Borderline Personality Disorder (just look at the title up there) so my emotions are all over the place at the best of times.
If my partner is reading this then I apologise in advanced for the massive pain in the arse I’m going to be. I don’t know how I can ever make it up to you but I will spend the rest of my life trying to find a way.
But Then What Will I Write About?
If you or anyone you know is struggling with mental health then please please please don’t suffer alone. Use the NHS service finder to find your local mental health services, ring the Samaritans or talk to your GP. One of the worst things about mental health problems is feeling that you are alone and if there’s one thing I can guarantee you, it’s that you’re not.
Thanks for reading and I’ll see you all next time. Until then, remember to take care of yourselves. Peace.
An internet classic to cheer you up ❤ .